Reassurance Cancelled.
Nothing adjusted.
Something in the room went quiet too quickly.
Silence thickened by a fraction,
and my body caught it first,
thin blue light stopped for a second,
my hearing slowed.
It wasn’t the sound we remembered first.
Before the light came push,
a hard push to the left,
silence still thickening.
Sometimes this gets better,
a clench in stomach agreed.
His body failed to turn before he knew he’d tried.
He didn’t remember its taste,
but it knew the shape of him.
silence relaxed. breathing in motion.
Tried again.
Fail.
He could see the button.
Amber. Glowing. Inviting.
Move.
Fail.
again.
Stomach cramping now.
Back pulled into an arch.
Hairs on spine sticking up through the shirt.
Move.
Insertion complete.
The screen flashed without concern.
Memory banks status: unknown.
System initialisation 23%.
Failed.
Screen went black.
Cursor blinking rapidly,
Faster.
The silence moved closer in
ㅤㅤ
For those who choose to go a little deeper,
paid subscribers get
a monthly essay,
access to a Guided Noticing,
and occasional paid-only pieces.
Everything I publish publicly stays public.
This is about making space for slower work, and for people who want to stay close to how it’s made.
If you’ve been hovering, this is a good moment to step in.
I’m always open to thoughtful writing collaborations.
Other prose and poems.
Nothing truly leaves — it just changes how it stays.
If something moved in you — a silence that whispered — I’d love to hear it below, or in my DM’s.
All artwork courtesy of NDjin Gallery
This piece speaks to me how trauma creates disassociation and how our body and minds try to reboot - much like a computer would. Lovely art of the metaphor.
Now I’m cutting and wondering how it’s possible for silence to thicken by a fraction.. I love how you bring into your texts the idea that the human body perceives first and only then thinks and reacts. And that’s exactly how it is. It’s just that we don’t listen to our body. We’re not even fully aware of its presence. You’re a very subtle observer of human nature. And my comment is like a little pebble thrown into the ocean compared to your comments, which are so delightful. But know that it’s made with all my heart and with full attention.